words of the day:
"An expert is an ordinary fellow from another town."
~J. Vernon McGee~
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J calls me the dork to the tenth power, a nerdy nerd and I think I am, really am in a way. I guess when I get bored with the very normal life I get a little insane. I believe all of us have some kind of insanity within us that we sometimes fail to admit. As I have said before, what is normal in this crazy world anyway?
Okey, I have these weird peculiar habits that annoys J so often. I love kissing and smelling his ears. I would go for the ear first. I also think it's weird but I am hooked to it. I don't really know why I am so fond of the ears. He would tell me " You are bizzare-O!" I also like to bite and it annoys him so much. I would bite him everytime he extends a part of his body like his arm or his shoulders. I might bite hard sometimes that he jerks in pain and warn me to back off. I know, it is weird,it's like my teeth are itchy and I have to bite.
There's also this strange incidents of me laughing uncontrollably, it's like I almost couldn't stop it then I started crying.And I mean really cry. I know of course that sometimes when people laugh and can't stop laughing they could have tears swelling, but mine is different. There are times that I keep laughing and can't help it and it continous until I start crying uncontrollably. It sounds crazy, isn't it? What do you call that? Laughing Syndrome? It happened maybe for the third time now, only this time I know what's gonna happen so I tried to compose myself and I didn't cry this time. I was already on my way to work and there's still that laugh inside trying to burst out even the thought of it now makes me smile. If I think of it, there wasn't even something funny. Oh well, those crazy moments do happen.
ever wonder what causes hiccups? Maybe the thing with that laughing syndrome has similar thing with that of the hiccups.I mean the body can do a lot of these little noises like burp and fart and hiccup and yawn even the popping of the knuckles or the back. Of course the pipe at our throat makes most the noise from shout to scream to whisper. But some other parts of our bodies also makes even weird noises just like the blowing of the nose.There are of course some noises that the body causes that are unmentionables. Why am I talking about all these things forgive me. It all started from the laughing syndrome.
words of the day:
There is no mistake so great
as that of always being right !!!
~My Fortune Cookie ~
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I know I have been away too long. Sometimes i just get lazy. I know even if I have some ideas to write, I just get lazy.Or sometimes, I just have nothing to write. Sometimes I just wanted to think alone by myself. Take a day or days off from thinking out loud and just think in silence me and myself.Well, there are times of course that there are a lot of things going on, a lot of overwhelming feelings that no words can just describe them, so no use writting them down, otherwise it will just be plain blank. f I were a painter I could just paint them.
I'm wondering who could have missed me or my writtings. If there are, I'm sorry for the delay. I just took some days off from my log and got away from my keyboard for a few days. It's flattering to just think that there are invisible readers, even if there were none really. It's just to feed the brain to keep popping things to discuss or to talk about.That's something great about this virtual world we are in. One does not have to personally meet people to be able to voice out what's in the mind. With the modern technology people could be able to talk virtually to the rest of the world.
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Do dreams really mean anything. This is a topic that has fascinated me for months now. I am a lucid dreamer myself and a lot of my dreams puzzles me.I wake up some mornings with weird feelings from my dreams. Sometimes my dreams are so vivid that I couln't tell if I was even asleep or awake. Some dreams turns out into nightmares, but those are just a few cases with me. Nightmares but not that too scary. Most of the time I enjoy my adventures into dreamland. From most of the dreams I have had, I could say that they are predictions of what is to happen. Mostly symbolic in nature. Some of course just resemble my mood/feelings the night before.
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One of the places we have been to during the last few weeks was the
MUSEUM OF AVIATION in Warner Robins, Georgia. One of the biggest museum of aviation in the world which houses a lot of the artifacts and aircrafts used during the World War II and other wars like the Korean, Vietnam and the Cold war. Actually J was born within the Robins Airforce Base.His dad was in the military and he spent a lot of his childhood days within the Airforce Bases. It is a spectacular view once you are above viewing all the aircrafts. It's even awesome to be able to stand next to these humungous aircrafts. I felt so tiny amongst these monstrous engines.Of course I took some
pictures. And I will be adding some more later.
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I love fall. When I went out this morning I felt the cool breeze, evident of the change in the season. I love it when it is so temparate, not too cold, not too hot. I had been wanting to go out to the mountains maybe, climb the mountains or go camping. Maybe we'll have the chance this fall. I love trail hiking, just wandering into the woods and actually experience nature first hand. Most of all I adore the mountains. It has it's magnificent powers over nature. It's this feeling of being at the peak overlooking everything else. This is what I seek in places to live. I love lakes, mountains, forests/woods, if possible a place where there are a lot of flora and fauna. Actually I am planning to put up a whole garden within and outside my home if we ever get a permanent one.I love plants, from vines to foliage to almost anything green and brown. I treat my plants like people would treat thier pets.I pamper them and takes very good care of them. Just the other day we just harvested two red ripe tomatoes from my tomato plants. There are still eleven others still green and growing. The lucky bamboos that was given to me as a gift on my birthday died, they turned brown. Now I bought three more and added to the remaining two left. One is a curled one. I also have another pot full of lucky bamboo in my dining area. I have had them since last year. They still look so robust and green. Perhaps I do have a green thumb. I am worried that some of my plants will not thrive in winter time. My aloe vera plants died last winter.They got frozen when I left them outside in the patio. I would have to keep myself from buying some more plants because of the change in weather. Perhaps I should just get some woody plants that could stand the weather.
A friend is, as it were, a second self. ~Marcus Tullius Cicero~
Friendship improves happiness and abates misery, by the doubling of our joy and the dividing of our grief.
~Marcus Tullius Cicero~
One thing I miss back home is being able to "mangapit-bahay" (chitchatting/hanging around with neighbors). Friends can be found everywhere, but in the Philippines you could meet people and make friends easily. People hang out with thier nieghbors as part of the family. I remember I used to make some Filipino food and bring some to the next door nieghbor and hang out. Just chatting or just doing stuff.Of course people still do that here in the Us but not as much because of the busy life. People does not necessarily meet a lot of people because most of the time they are in thier cars or in thier homes. I have a co-worker, a Korean guy who has an uncle in the Philippines and he said that if he were to choose, he would love to live and stay in the
Philippines because he could make a lot of friends there. He finds Philippines a nicer place to live compared to living in the US.
One thing I miss is the slower pace of life in the Philippines. Here in the US, people are always in a hurry. It's like work, work, work is the life here. People has to pay years of mortgages, car insurances,bills, bills, bills never ending bills months after months. It's so much into paying bills and not enough time to enjoy life. Well, anyway that's just my observations. That's why people does not have time anymore to socialize and meet thier nieghbors because they are always busy. Often times they don't even know thier nieghbors. It seems that people here doesn't even want to meet and hang around with nieghbors. It's the total opposite of what I was brought up to.
Let's go back to our topic on friends. Can miles truly separate you from friends....If you want to be with someone you love, aren't you already there?
~Richard Bach~
Sometimes I feel like the distance have separated me with my friends. In spirit of course I always want to reach to them and bond with them. But the distance has worn out the bond that was built for many years. After long years, it seems that we are strangers to each other. beliefs, cultures have changed and it's hard to reach out and meet halfway.I long for the day to be able to go to where they are and meet them physically and see what happened to thier lives, to see the changes in them and thier lives. I'm sure even the place,
my town has a lot of changes. People growing up, new kids brought up, cultures evolved and a lot of changes. It would be fascinating to be back home and see the changes after years of being away.
I was watching
star treck and I was fascinated about thier technology in the show where they could beam themselves and go to another planet. It would be very nice to have that technology at present. I would be able to beam myself right to my hometown for a day, then be back in a few minutes in the US.That would be perfect. But I wonder when will they ever make that technology possible. Maybe in my second lifetime. Meanwhile, I just keep dreaming at this present lifetime.
Words of the day:
Learn to enjoy every minute of your life. Be happy now.
Don't wait for something outside of yourself
to make you happy in the future.
Think how really precious is the time you have to spend,
whether it's at work or with your family.
Every minute should be enjoyed and savored.
~ Earl Nightingale ~
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I have made my own
sushi today. I learned just by watching. The only problem making my own is that I can't avail of all the raw fish and raw seafoods. But I opted to using shrimp and crab sticks. Well, in making sushi, one should have the following; sushi mat, nori or the roasted seaweed, sushi rice or Jasmine rice, wasabi, and pickled ginger. For the whole materials and process for
rolling your own sushi you could always look up in the internet or look up in some sushi recipe books. I haven't had the taste for raw fish, like raw salmon, raw tuna before, but I have learned eating sushi during my stay in Hongkong. It is actually good. I also like raw mussels and raw oysters. The thing is they have to be really fresh and kept in freezers and fridge because it can cause poisoning. Raw seafoods have to be handled with extra care.
One could put almost any seafood, any flavor in the sushi. For my own
sushi rolls I used cream cheese, thinly sliced carrots and cucumber, romaine lettuce, avocado, crab sticks and deep fried battered shrimp. Some of my favorite seafood in my
sushi sashimi are barbeque eel, salmon, tuna and red snapper.
Before starting to make your own sushi, one should know the things you would need. Me, I have started mine just because I have been watching the sushi chefs. I haven't read any books and haven't researched in the internet.Now, I have to go back at the grocery store for the nth time to buy
NORI. My husband is getting pissed off after I had him drive all over town to buy the ingredients I needed. We went to three Asian stores and two regular grocery stores in order to have all the necessary materials for sushi. But now, I don't have to spend so much to eat sushi. They are not cheap, but I think it is cheaper to make your own. It is even better if you are close to the coast where seafoods are cheaper and fresher.
I think I am more an adventure eater than my husband. He is slightly squimish. But I think I could almost eat anything. I have eaten bugs when I was young and they didn't taste bad. I like grilled & roasted .This sushi making is another adventure for me.It is fun at the same time I learn new stuff. Maybe On J's birthday I will make some and let my in-laws taste them and see how they like my sushi.
"The doctors X-rayed my head and found nothing."
~Dizzy Dean explaining how he felt after being hit on the head by a ball in the 1934 World Series
I have this black hollow feeling, a dark tunnel within that I couldn't describe. I have been in a terrible mood to J, I even refused to apologize for my bad attitude. I felt okey when I woke up but later on, I felt this black hole siphoning the life out of me. I guess I just have the blahs. I haven't had this feeling in a while though. Don't you have those feelings of "nothingness" sometimes?
While I am feeling nothing, I try to think of something. I am actually thinking of a very good friend whom I have tried calling and frustration sets in because it seems the phone is working but it seems she couldn't hear me, yet I could hear her voice. Ah! so near yet so far. I haven't talked to her in a long time. And it actually makes me a little sad because she's the only person whom I feel so close to, yet it seems I am losing her. Maybe it's me, maybe it's just my feelings but we don't talk like we would share every volume of our lives just like before. She doesn't call and doesn't write anymore. I just hope that she is doing well. And that she's not avoiding conversing with me because she is in some life crisis.Perhaps the distance has gradually broke us apart.
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Hold me now, I'm six feet from the edge and I 'm thinking.....it's over now. Well, that's a portion of the song ONE LAST BREATHE by
CREED. I actually like some of thier songs. I also like
JEWEL. I llike some of her songs. I like
this one.
Here's a quiz what kind of jewel you are.Below is the result of the quiz I took. I mean not the singer jewel, but jewel, the gem.
You're a Diamond. You seem like a cold and an
unreachable person outside, yet you are
beautiful inside and outside. You may be
stubborn at times. You act with grace and
elegance and you are a precious asset to all
your friends.
What Jewel Are You? brought to you by Quizilla
And life is what we make it.
Always has been, always will be.
--Grandma Moses
Here's a song composed by J. The lyrics were inspired by two different songs. He made his own version. He even made a tape of it and edited it. His thoughts while making this song was actually his upcoming birthday. He dreads the fact that he is turing thirty on the 22nd of this month. He says that you can't hold the moment, nothing waits for anybody. One way motor run- simply means that he is going in one direction and there's no U-turn. No going back.
When you find your way home its the best you can be.
Lost out on the highway aint the place for me.
I close my eyes then I realize I wont see you again.
If i find my peace of mind I'll blow back with the wind...
I'm, I'm a one way motor run. I'm a new day shinning on, one more time.
I'm, I'm a one way motor run. I'm the road less travelled on, I do it all the time.
When you find your way home its the best you can be.
Lost out on the highway aint the place for me.
I close my eyes then I realize I wont see you again.
If i find my peace of mind i'll blow back with the wind...
I'm, I'm a one way motor run. I'm a new day shinning on, one more time.
I'm, I'm a one way motor run. I'm the road less travelled on, I do it all the time.
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I have also tried to illustrate some of my very
own practical tips. I have always thought of myself as a practical person and kind of traditional in some ways.
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words of the day:
We learn wisdom from failure much more than from success. We often discover what will do, by finding out what will not do; and probably he who never made a mistake never made a discovery.
~Samuel Smiles~
I try to enjoy other people's interesting lives. I mean, just by merely listening to thier stories tells a lot about what kind of life they live and what kind of persons they are.Although I am not so quick to judge other people. I don't really judge them. I just try to analyze them how they tell thier lives and how they appear to be. Most of the time they want to portray themselves of what they think is ideal. Others of course just face you with thier real face. Others in a mask, still some others try to alter thier image to decieve you. Physical image can be so decieving. I know a lot of people are not really what they appear to be. People's lives have amused me in a lot of ways.Others leave me intrigued, curious,fascinated, bewildered. Others just leave and gone.
One time,I commented "hieght doesn't matter". And I firmly believe that. I am small. A guy called me "shorty" at work. It's actually the second time a guy commented on my height. I told him " I am not short, I'm just cute"! And really I do believe that I can do well as much as any tall or average women. I even think I can do better. I think I am not just boosting my ego, but I really believe in it. It's the power of the mind. "If you think BIG, big things can happen".
With the many people I met, I have discovered that tall people may not really feel tall inside. There are small people that stands tall amongst the crowd and of course there are some that really are as they appear to be.
There are people also that tries so hard to put color to thier lives, instead they are painting thier lives black. It's pathetic. I mean they wanted so much to be interesting, they put all kinds of stunts, but deep within thier life seems so bland.I guess these are the people who are trying to find happiness in the wrong places.
There are people of course that I have encountered that have left lasting imprints in me.It is very rare but magical.And I would love to meet more people that have magics in their words and actions.
words of the day:
Flatter me, and I may not believe you. Criticize me, and I may not like you. Ignore me, and I may not forgive you. Encourage me, and I will not forget you. Love me and I may be forced to love you.
~ William Arthur Ward~
Words of the day:
I have seen what a laugh can do.It can transform almost unbrearable tears into something bearable, even hopeful. ~Bob Hope~
There's nothing than contagious laughter. ~Jennifer Aniston~
Laughter trully has therapuetic effects. It feels so much better working when people we work with have sense of humor. It's almost like playing. I don't feel worn out when I am having fun at work.
If we could hold on to these moments when we are having fun, it would be great. But life goes on a cycle, and nothing stays forever. All things move forward / regress, change. We can't take a hold of a good moment in the palm of our hands. They just come and go just like the wind that comes and goes. But I believe we could keep great moments in our hearts and minds. It's the pages of our lives we should ear mark on the chapters of our lives to revisit time and time again, especially during the most trying times.
LAUGHTER lightens our hearts, our lives and seems to make life better. We laugh, we cry, we frown, we make faces. But it's laughter that heals a lot of the worlds physical, psychological, emotional social and spiritual illnesses. Laughter keeps us alive and enthusiastic.
So laugh out loud and keep that laughing.Allow your brain to be tickled from time to time. It's good for you.
Words of the day:
LOVE is not that beautiful spark. Sure that starts it.But it is the finnish that matters.
I didn't do anything yesterday but read. I finnished the book at three o'clock in the morning. It was a book by Sigmund Brouwer,
OUT OF THE SHADOWS. It is almost a tragedy, but not really. It's also a christian fiction written in the first person. When I started to read it, the series emotions in the book starting to almost envelope me.
I felt like I was a character in the story.
When I was reading
DREAMSIDE by Graham Joyce.It felt so real to me. The story was so vivid or was it my imagination? I was reading it at night and I was so scared to go to sleep since the book was all about dreams. I even stopped reading it because I was alone. When I was going up to our room, the darkness frieghtened me. J forgot to turn on the night light. I even gave him a hard time for that because I was really terrified. I had the urge to wake him up, but I fought the idea.He hates being woke up.It took me a while to go to sleep. I just stared into the darkness of the room and almost jumped at every movement I noticed.I am glad it was only for one night. Otherwise sleeping would be a torture.
For now, I always look forward to going to sleep. I love the idea of dreaming. And I mean nice dreams. It's almost like I visit other places in my dreams. Other dimensions. Some places out of this world. Most of the people I see in my dreams are people I know in my hometown. Last night I saw Veamora, my neighbor back in the Philippines.She was smiling at me. Then there was shift in the scene, I was walking by a road, it was raining.Then the scene shifted again.I was at a bottom of a hill. Everywhere on the slope of the hill were glasses, but it was not whole, they werelike cut on the side.There were flowers and something red placed on them, like vases. I walked up the hill and reached the top. There was a man. And he showed me my three green pepper plants. He said he pruned them. He was about to cut some more but I prevented him. Then the scene shifted again and I was by a gate. I went in, and there was another gate I keep openning wooden gates after another. The gates where in an open field. There were events that seems vague and can't be described. But that's what I can remember of my dream from last night. I wonder what it means.
Last Saturday night I had a dream. In my dream I saw my brothers. They hugged me sweetly. I felt thier affection. They looked great. In that dream they were supposed to be my brothers but they don't look like my brothers. In that dream I was hanging around with one of my brothers, we were just talking and having a good time. I wondered what it meant. When I went to work that day I saw Ms.Jung's two sons running around. They look so cute. I wanted to pinch them. And that day too I had a good time at work with my co-workers chatting and teasing and joking around. I believe that my dream was just a symbolism of what was gonna happen to me or whom I will meet that day. Although in my dream, the feelings are more intense. In real time it wasn't, but I did had a good time. I know that significant dreams leave me an intense emotion after waking up. I know then that it is a significant dream.
To dream is like walking between a thin line of imagination and reality.I mean there seems to be a thin curtain that separates the real world and beyond, whatever there is beyond. But I believe that whatever happens during our dreams has something to do with our real life.
