Sunday

The World We Revolve In

"Fortify yourself with flock of friends! You can select them at random, write to one, dine with one, visit one or take your problems to one. There's always one who will understand, inspire, and give you the lift you may need at the time"~George Matthew Adams
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It's always fun to meet people whom we have some things in common, you know people whom we can relate or people who can relate to what we are talking about. It was the other night when I worked with Ms. Teena. She said she was born in Italy and they moved here in the US when she was ten. I asked here how many times she had visited her hometown since then, she said about three times. She's from Sicily. I don't know much about Italy except I had a former co-worker who used to live in Florence. She told me tales of her two year stay. According to her, people would take a nap after lunch. Stores would be closed and that families would have a big meal for lunch then take a break for nap time. Then stores would be open again at four in the afternoon. I was like hmmm, that's something similar to what people do to where I came from. Most people in the smaller towns, in the provinces would go home and have lunch at home. And may even take a nap before going back to work or school. It was something I experienced growing up in a small town.

She also said that when they went back after so many years, it feels strange and people whom she left behind, she imagined them the way they were when she left. So, she was amazed when she went back and saw the big changes, not only the people she knows, but also the place. I was nodding my head in total agreement because I know exactly what she was talking about. When I went back home after nearly three years working in Hongkong, I was amazed at how grown up the little kids I left behind. I didn't even recognized them. I think what happens is that, things,people froze to the our last glance. We don't see the changes, naturally things change, people change, people grow old, I mean it's a natural flow of nature. So, the next time we see them they have already undergone the changes, even people do undergo the natural wear and tear of everyday life. Some people may stay younger looking, some may have added years of age. It's just that we just had another world, but time moves in every corners of the earth. To others it may seem so fast, to others, seems slow, but time is the flame in which we burn. It's always moving and taking everything in it's way with it including friends.

Living on the other side of the globe really changes a lot of things. It's like you know, your whole life has to be altered to suit the place. That means settling down, adjusting to the place, meeting new faces. And eventually have to meet new friends. That's what I have been trying to do lately since I knew people miles away. I figure I should meet people closer by and I did. It was meeting friends through their friends and it worked well with me. I won't be hanging out a lot with them because of the loaded schedule I have but at least I know someone whom I can hang around with, maybe chat when things gets so mundane. I still have to meet her circle of friends, but I have already talked to them in the virtual world.

It has become a challenge to me after long months of trying to get in touch to a once very close friend. She still is. It's just that she has her own world now. She is a very articulate person. Sweet, and does a lot fo things to please friends. With that in mind, I think I don't have to worry so much about her since she can make friends easily, very easily. She's got the skill of making friends. Something that I envy when we were still in school. We had been friends for a very long time. It's just that time and distance has worn out that friendship. The last time we had a heart to heart talk, she confessed, she hasn't found anyone whom she felt the same way like our friendship. I told her, me too. Our commitment to each other was like that of a husband and wife commitment. Although I didn't mind her having new friends because to me it's part of growing. We always said to each other that she'll be my forever bestfriend and she mine.Of course things changed a little bit when I got married and moved. I barely reached her with my nightly phone calls across the miles. I deeply felt sad. I was really hurt at first, but it has been months now, a year may have passed now. For some reason she seems unreachable. For now, I try to keep it as a challenge for me to seek friends. It's almost a void, a space in my life to find that kind of friendship I had with her maybe with another person. Of course my friendship with my spouse is still different. I think I just miss younger years. It's something and someone to look forward to seeing on my next visit to my home town. Hopefully, she will still be around.

Friends, there's something about physical interaction that bonds us closer to friends. I guess it has something to do with being physically able to hear their voices, to share the laughters. The physical bonding, to be able to feel their pressence. To feel that pat on the shoulder when they try comfort us. To go and see places together. To share the inner most secrets and feelings we have. I guess it' what E would call "female bonding". And yes, I miss the "girls night out." Hopefully, I will get to do that on my days off maybe with the new friends I have met. I remember a friend's husband saying that men should have two wives, not so that husbands can have sex to both of them but so that the wives have each other to talk to since women seems to want to just talk. I guess it's something he observed from his wife. That she just want to talk about a lot of things. I guess it's just him. I wouldn't say that all husbands feel the same way. I was like, huh, if you have two wives, then it will be double the trouble you are already experiencing right now. Which of course realistically would be so true. Not only because wives would want to be the only women in their husband's life, but women have more complexities that men don't have but that's what makes them women. Hay! women, so simple yet so complex!So, as they say.


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